Making a mess
As I sit down to write this, Victoria is in lockdown 6.0. It’s made me think about order and chaos, about mess and disarray, about pandemonium and calm. When I reflect back on the most memorable and favourite NaturePlay sessions I have facilitated, and some of my own family’s favourite memories, it is those that were the most free (and most messy) that come to mind.
This blog hopes to serve as a reminder that chaos is sometimes inevitable. Allowing yourself and your children to let go and become absorbed in the moment, without care of the mess, may be a great option for these somewhat rollercoaster times.
Story 1 - let the mess happen!
This first image comes from a “glorious mud” birthday party. All the children ended up covered in mud, some were literally swimming in it! This was in August a few years ago, when there was some sun, but still quite cool temperatures. The kids started slow, with muddy hands, muddy face, muddy feet. With enthusiasm and space to play, many children ended up completely covered in mud! You can probably see that these kids were not 0-5years, and may have responded differently if they were, but they were all happy and absorbed in the moment and in their play. At the end of the day, after a few loads of washing and some baths/showers, the mess was gone, calm was restored and yet some fabulous memories remained.
Story 2 - Adults can get messy too
Messy fun is not just for the kids! (Yes, this is me in this photo…in cropping out some of the kids, only my legs are seen!) One of the best things I have experienced, in all my time as a facilitator of NaturePlay groups, is the opportunity to make a mess myself. It wasn’t always this way. On my very first day facilitating a Nature group, I remember feeling a little unsure about getting my own hands dirty! Seems hard to believe now, but I noticed that no-one in the group was getting their hands dirty, and I realised that I didn’t actually want to get mine dirty either! My response seemed clear, I would have to be the one to set the scene and have a go….and the rest is history. From this experience, I realised that it’s very valid to be keen to get involved, but feel cautious or unsure about how to get started. If this is you, then jump in, have a go! Take your shoes off, dig with your hands, make mud pies with your kids, sit on the grass and get a wet, dirty bottom…or jump in that puddle, with as much enthusiasm as you can muster!
Story 3 - Messy mealtimes
My overall aim, when I started my babies on solid food, was to create the space for mealtimes to be fun (more in this earlier blogpost) and have as many opportunities for “real” food to be on offer as I could manage. For my family, this meant a whole lot of play and a whole lot of mess! (If you want to read more about “playing with food”, here’s a post about that). At times I was overwhelmed by the mess, so I tried to find practical ways to allow the mess to happen, whilst acknowledging and supporting myself to be brave about the mess. Long-sleeved bibs, feeding in the bath, taking meals outside and getting help to do the clean up all became useful strategies. Mealtimes were certainly not always fun, and my children took some time to become well-mannered dinner guests! But overall we’ve had some very memorable meal-times (and developed a strong relationship with “real” food)
Dealing with the Mess
I know that the clean-up part of mess-making is going to be an important part of allowing the mess to be created, so here are some ideas for making the clean-up more achievable.
Take it outside - it’s much easier to deal with the mess outside! If you’re in your own backyard, you could just take all the muddy, wet, painty clothes off, put them straight into the washing machine, and pop your kids in the bath/shower. If there’s a muddy patch of the yard where your kids can play freely, you may not even need to do any outdoor clean up.
Make a plan - I’ve always been so opposed to plans as I never wanted to miss out on any spontaneous opportunities for fun. I’ve since come around to plans, as sometimes it’s the plan that helps me actually DO things. If you know that the mess is coming, and you know that you want to relax and allow your children the space to be carefree with their creations (muddy, painty, foody or whatever), then a vision for clean-up may make it easier. Have a bath ready, have dinner or a snack or a warm drink ready to go, have spare clothes ready to go…or it could be a bucket of warm, soapy water that the kids can go to when they feel they’re ready to get cleaned up.
Long-sleeved bibs can be fabulous. Or the bibs with a pouch that can catch food. I’m sure there are newer products available to make the mess easier to manage. Bibs/smocks may work for art creations too, although some kids seem to like them more than others!
Do it more than once - the first time you try anything new can bring challenges you had not even considered. It may seem to be a complete disaster, be deeply uncomfortable or just indescribably overwhelming. So don’t just do it once. Tweak your plan, try again and keep having another go. Focus on what your child enjoys and allow them the time they need to feel comfortable and to play. If mess-making is a very new experience for you or your child, then it may take a go or two or twenty to build confidence and comfort. Lucky for you, there will be many, many more opportunities for your child/ren to play and eat and create, so keep having a go!
Good Luck, take care and kind regards for your messy adventures.
