What do I do now? Values as a guide to next steps
People like to have a plan. And when plan A doesn't work, we like to have a plan B ready to go. For example, when our child doesn't like their favourite treat for some reason, it's nice to have a spare snack just in case.
What happens if something unplanned happens? Or if there is a major incident in our lives that we didn't believe would or could happen to us? We often get confused, shocked, and wonder, "What do I do next?".
If you are stuck in one of these situations, there is a simple strategy that can go a long way to guiding you on your next steps. Ask yourself about your values.
Values are the "...ing" words that describe ourselves, the words that point to who we really are deep down, or who we aspire to be. For example, some employees aspire to be "collaborating" in their work, some friends want to be "caring" when with friends, and some parents would hope that their children describe them as "loving".
The great thing about values is that we as individuals get to choose them, and that they are like an internal compass or sense of direction that never gets old. You can choose to be "caring" or "loving" every day.
Often when in a sticky situation, or a very confusing time, values can bring about clarity on which practical options are best for us to try next, or the kinds of resources or supports we need to engage with right now.
Some quick ways to get clear about your values are:
1) Imagine that you are living in world with no limits, no barriers, and limitless resources. What kind of person would you choose to be?
2) Look up a list of values and see which ones speak to you (for example pick out a list that has more than 20, and my tip is to have a dictionary ready!)
3) Picture yourself watching a documentary of your life, with interviews of your closest friends, work colleagues, children, or family members. How would you like them to describe you? What words would you most like to hear?
About Mark Baker (guest blogger):
Mark enjoys introducing himself first and foremost as a father and husband. He is a registered counsellor and is a passionate advocate for great quality and highly accessible mental health support. Mark is currently employed as an Employee Assist Counsellor in the Geelong and Surf Coast areas of Victoria.
